Now having said that, and upon retrospect, it's not the worst day ever - it's just been a bit of an emotional roller coaster day with lots of' 'busy' thrown in and lots of driving hither and yon.
I think it's more that I gave into the sad feelings and the overwhelming-ness of everything that made it such a terribly bad day.
Being sick doesn't help and well...it's been crappity crap all around (with a nod to Dottie Angel on that one)
I've read, more than once, that to be happy one must choose to be happy.
Apparently, it really is your choice.
Amazing isn't it? That if you stop for just a second and make that choice - to choose to be happy, to choose to change the direction of your day, it will change your week, your month, your life.
I believe it.
I truly do.
Doesn't mean I practice it as much as I should. Or could, but I am about to change that.
The top 5 regrets of the dying are:
1. Wish I'd had the courage to live my life true to myself and not the life others expected of me
2. Wish I hadn't worked so hard
3. Wish I had the courage to express my feelings
4. Wish I had stayed in touch with my friends
5. Wish I had let myself be happier
Read that again.
Seriously. Read it...again.
Powerful stuff. Found that tonight and I have to say, it's shaken me up a wee bit.
Numbers 1 and 3? I live them already.
Sometimes it's a struggle but I'm there for the most part.
It's those numbers 2, 4 and 5 that have got me shook up. Yikes.
I'm doing some serious thinking about those...and making changes.
My sweet child deserves a happier mom - heck, I deserve a happier self.
I consider myself to be a happy person but with all the busy in my life, and demands on my time and energy - I can't say that I'm always at my happy best.
I've lost touch with friends and I know I work too much and too hard.
Most days, I think about what I am grateful for, and that seems to get me on the right track.
I've not tried keeping a Gratitude Journal...yet (we just got some in the shops for Christmas so it's been on my mind lately).
The people I know who do keep such journals, have felt a real change within themselves and their outlook.
I like that.
I like that such a simple, quiet, sweet task can have such a profound effect.
We all have blue days, we all have troubles and regardless, we all have so much to be grateful for.
A gentle reminder of that is good.
I'm going to start right now.
Tonight, I am so very grateful for...
- the strangely comforting sound of the falling rain against my windowpane
- my healthy little girl
- delivery pizza that my daughter will eat cuz I'm too sick and tired to cook dinner
- the comforting light of candles
- and cold white wine
What are you grateful for?